img @ the asylum

Along with misspellings, fart jokes, and people falling down, the BCU staff’s immature 12-year-old boy sense of humor includes unintended sexual innuendo. Luckily, some guy in Connecticut snapped this pic from a Friendly’s menu that made us giggle like children.

Ah yes, the OBC Million Dollar Sweepstakes party. It was less than a month ago but it feels like it’s been ages!

Tre Mannings, our MDS contestant, was flown out from his home in Pennsylvania, put up in a stellar hotel, and then treated to a night on the town, OBC style!

The night ended with a party at San Diego’s Stingaree club, hosted by Playmates Sara Underwood and Bridget Marquardt, and his chance to win a million bucks, all in celebration OnlineBootyCall hitting the 4 million member mark!

We could regale you with stories about the celebs, sexy women, and premium liquors that flowed from our bottle service tables that night if our memories weren’t all so foggy, so instead, we’ll let this video do the talking!

While at the offices of BCU we aren’t avid Miller Lite drinkers, we have to give them props for this ad, parodying the well-known Match.com ads which show “spontaneous” and “unscripted” interviews with “real couples” that met on the site and are now on their way to “perfect, happy, in-love” matrimony.

And while it’s a hilarious ad, and we giggle at the thought of someone actually enjoying Miller Lite that much, it seems to unintentionally say what we’ve been saying for years- silly sites that claim peoples’ main goal in life should be to settle down with “The One” ignore the ever-expanding niche of singles who understand marriage isn’t the only option! Alright, fine, the ad isn’t saying exactly that, but it sure does make you think! Thanks you Miller Lite! Not for your cringe-inducing lager, but for an ad that proves people can be stay single and still be happy, as long as they’ve  got their favorite beer!

img @ mnijm.wordpress

Happy Fat Tuesday, BCU readers! Break out your beads, gentlemen, because Mardi Gras, code word for indulgence, is finally here. San Diego’s celebration is set to tear up the streets of the Gaslamp, but before heading out to make a fools of ourselves, we figured we’d set some groundrules. Here are BCU’s Mardi Gras regulations.

1. DO train before the big day.

Although a week long detox in preparation may sound like a good idea, you have to compare your liver to your stomach for this event- you can’t let it get lazy and/or shrink. Prepare by drinking copious amounts of liquor in the days preceding Fat Tuesday, so you can get used to the inevitable wrath of the spins and mind-numbing hangovers.

2. DON’T pee on the streets.

Maybe back in the early 1980s this was considered a funny, celebratory aspect of Mardi Gras. However, with stringent new laws on “exposing yourself,” peeing on the street will only lead to either an expensive citation or a one way ticket out of the party. Find a bathroom, you streetrat.

3.  DO dress the part.

If you show up in something boring, say a suit, or any type of pant with the word “cargo” in the name, you will feel out of place, if not flat out ashamed. This is the one day out of the year that it is okay to rock a sparkly mask and crazy shirt. If you’re planning to get lucky, though, keep the glitter to your mask. Your shirt should not shine.

4. DON’T yell “show us your boobs!” anywhere outside the party.

At least in San Diego, Mardi Gras is confined to an 8 block radius, presumably to keep the booze-fueled miscreants away from the general public. Once you leave the gates of the party though, pull your self-control out back out of your ass and do NOT shout that refrain at elderly French-Catholic women out for dinner. However, on that note…

5. Ladies, DO take all degrading shouts with a grain of salt.

On Fat Tuesday, you will likely witness the most disturbing acts of male debauchery that you have or will ever see. But let’s be honest, this holiday has evolved from a religious tradition into a holiday based on giving women plastic beads to expose themselves. This is the one day this happens (assuming you don’t spend spring break in Mexico), so just drop it. Don’t flash dudes if you don’t want, but don’t complain. It’s not worth it.

You’ve got less than 5 hours to gear up for this day of ultimate debauchery. Get to the bar and gimme 20 (shots)!

As though we all needed another reason to guzzle a delicious lager after work… However- recent studies  show that drinking beer can actually strengthen your bones. Dietary silicon, a product found in both hops and barley, is known to help strengthen your bones, similar to calcium. However, scientists were always unsure if any of this product actually made it through the brewing process.

Some scientists at UC Davis (I imagine them to be quite the party animals) recently performed some tests that seem to show that dietary silicon is still quite prevalent in most lightly-hued beers, and that in fact most Americans get their dietary silicon from this exact source.

So, basically what your saying, scientists, is that if I drink 15 – 20 beers a day, can pretty much become Superman… right?

Full story at news.com.au

In an office where the word “duty” incites 3rd-grader-like giggles, it is no surprise that CollegeHumor’s post about the top oddly sexual product names would cause almost painfully immature bouts of hysterical laughter. And although you may not have the same sense of humor as this bunch of short-bus riding geeks, we thought we’d share our top 5 favorites.

1) Flaming Blue Balls

Yes, flaming blue balls. I have to believe that the creators of this product knew what they were doing. I mean, wouldn’t you assume that a ball that was flaming would be red? A fiery, fiery red? I mean, I know that at really hot temperatures fire can turn blue, but I don’t believe that a low-grade, black market fireworks distributor would take that into consideration.

2)Booty Goo

Because I’m sure having to change a baby’s rashy, diarrhea-scented diaper isn’t gross enough, they’ve created a product called Booty Goo, complete with a picture of a baby and his obscenely huge butt.

3) The Nut TwisterHow are you feeling right about now, gentlemen? Good? Little queasy, maybe? Here, let me help. Go ahead and imagine your “walnuts” being strategically placed into this quality William Bounds nut twister and then twisted. Twisted until the shell breaks. Feel better now? I thought so.

4) Splügen

After a long hard week in the office, nothing makes a Friday better than downing a delicious frothy bottle of Splügen. Don’t forget to pour it right so it has the proper amount of head. Too far? Nah, I didn’t think so.

5) Wack Off!

I’m not even really sure what the manufacturer was going for in this case. I mean, I suppose you “wack” bugs? And I guess you want to keep said bugs “off” you… right? However, those two words strung together make absolutely no sense except to make the girl in Wal-Mart who found it laugh really, really hard.

The BCU staff’s got it pretty good- amongst the old pizza and water bottles, there is usually a case of beer in the fridge, on reserve for late Friday nights working. However, some places don’t have as awesome an office, so they’ve had to improvise. We’ve seen our share of funny ways to hide alcohol. But this guy, who works for a paper company seemingly exactly like Dunder Mifflin from The Office. To the untrained eye, this table is a practical work station strewn with office supplies.

But to the select few who know… this table is a gold mine!

img @ dietsinreview

Well, not quite yet. But if we know one thing, it’s that men with mustaches wield a whole lot of power, and a recent poll of the American Mustache Institute, 80% of its members declared they’d prefer the Super Bowl be moved to a Saturday, claiming that it would increase the economic gain for grocery stores, restaurants and bars, and TV networks.

Now, we’re not sure how we feel about destroying the tradition of Super Bowl Sunday, but we’ve got to admit they make some valid points. How many times have you had to drag yourself, or be dragged, into the office Monday morning cause you partied too hard with all your buddies for the Super Bowl?

Check out the full story at Asylum, including a link to sign the petition to move the Super Bowl to Saturday!

Do you have adult onset ADHD? Does sitting for extended periods of time make you nervous and uncomfortable, even if football is on TV? Never fear, because the fine folks over at HolyTaco have created a Bingo card drinking game for the Super Bowl that will keep you entertained (and possibly belligerent) for the entire 4 quarters.  Print, and enjoy!

Remember a few days ago, when we posted rules for throwing a great Super Bowl? And how one of them was “Nix the Decorations?” Well, we’re gonna have to go ahead and add a footnote: if you have the incredible skills of the team at Break Media- keep the decorations. Below you see the most awesome Snack Stadium of all time. Every bit of the stadium is edible, from the massive chocolate cake field to the Twinkie-cars in the parking lot, to the strategically divided chip variations in the stands. At 4 feet by 7 feet, the sheer size of this appetizer building is awe-inspiring. To the culinary and architectural geniuses at Break, we salute you!